My walk through this life continues to be a joyous exploration of what it means to be a human being. Each day I strive to learn something new and to be the best I can be, to myself and to others.
I think I can sum up a little “About Me” by sharing this piece I wrote many years ago. I decided to call this story, the 14 Vows of Commitment. The events of this story revolve around my oldest daughter’s wedding and how the vows came to be.
So here goes.
It was the night before my daughter’s big day. As the father of the bride, I had to make a speech to address the 100 or so people in attendance. I began to search my soul for something I could put down on paper. I knew I did not want to get up in front of our family and friends and say how my daughter was “so this” and how she was “so that”. I also did not want to make light of the ceremony and the meaning of it.
They say, “God works in mysterious ways”. I tend to think of it as pre-emptive planning on His part. As it happened about month before the wedding, I had found myself in a rather delicate situation with my own relationship. I had become angry with my partner and we could not seem to communicate. As a result, I decide to separate from her. I soon realized I had made a terrible error in judgement and that running away from the issues was not an option. So, I asked myself the following questions:
What does it mean to me to be in a loving relationship?
What would I say now to someone who is willing to spend the rest of their life with me?
I am a spiritual person and in faith I prayed for guidance and true to the Spirit’s word, I was filled and I wrote the following 14 vows of commitment. By the way, they are in no particular order or rank since each of them could be placed at number one on the list.
So here goes.
I will be faithful physically, mentally, and spiritually.
I will not abandon you in your most difficult times.
I will endeavour communicate my needs to you clearly, not matter how uncomfortable I might feel.
I will care for you in your times of illness.
I will contribute whatever I can financially to make your quality of life better.
I will be honest.
I will be truthful.
I will listen when you speak.
I will love you unconditionally.
I will admit to you when I am wrong and ask for your forgiveness.
I will not purposely or in fun utter statements that demean or belittle you in front of others or in the sight of God.
I will constantly remind you of the love I bear for you.
I will not knowingly commit any act that causes you physical, mental, or spiritual harm.
I will seek counselling for any areas in me that are identified as needing help and I will do this willingly to improve myself as your loving partner.
In closing this list of vows, I realize that “life is a changing force”, thus new vows may be added and any vow herein altered.
I could not believe that these words flowed out of me. I was astounded. I also knew there was a greater purpose to these words than reaffirming my part in the relationship with my partner and that was revealed to me the night before the wedding.
There was a little more to the speech than just the vows but what I remember most was reading each vow and then pausing to look out over the audience. It was surreal. I was so calm and filled with peace. I knew the power of the Spirit had filled me and God’s message was hitting home.
Please feel free to use these words. They are not mine to profit by financially. They are inspired words of truth and I will always own them in my heart.